“When you look at the clouds they are not symmetrical. They do not form fours and they do not come along in cubes, but you know at once that they are not a mess. […] They are wiggly but in a way, orderly, although it is difficult for us to describe that kind of order. Now, take a look at yourselves. You are all wiggly.”By Alan Watts
I was cleaning up the basement when I came across a box of laminated drawings. They were a bunch of scribbles and doodles from my son when he was one or two years old. The supposed tiger looked more like a striped pig and the people were as tall as their triangle house. But I was so proud of these creations. They made me smile and they still do. I showed one to my son: “Look! You are so good at drawing ever since you were little!” “Urgh! So cringy. I am very bad at that, mom.” He shrugged.
Remember when we were little, we believed that we can be ANYTHING and we trust our adults since they have their life figured out. But when we are finally here at adulthood, the harsh reality is that most people have nothing figured out. We just became all judgy-judgy, mostly towards ourselves; battling between the anxiety when sober and depression during intoxication. Everything seems to have a timeline: when to graduate school; when to have a decent paying job; when to get married and have a kid; when to buy a house or change a car…You are messed up if you so dare to miss a deadline..or quit your 9 to 5 to be a writer.
But who are they to decide what timeline my life should follow? What form of life is indeed right or wrong? Is size 10 so much more shameful than a size 2? I mean, why can’t a tiger look like a striped pig? If that was your creation, then you own that world. It makes perfect sense however you want it to be.
Have you seen a “wrong shaped” cloud?Any shaped cloud is perfectly normal. It is just clouds being clouds. They can come and go flowing freely with the wind. Simply, freely…As Alan Watts said, we are all “wiggly”, like the cloud. So can we stop critizing our “wiggly”, “messed up” life and just be like a cloud?