9:30 am, I am sitting in my pajamas with a messy bun hanging on to the side of my head. Although it looks like that I just rolled out of my bed, I am actually an hour and half into work and have already finished most of the tasks required. My mom is panicking because she is having trouble getting into her English class on Zoom; my son has been in the washroom (probably with a book or iPad) for over half hour now? And my dog is barking insanely at the window for some mail man delivering my Amazon orders. And where is my coffee!
If you asked me a year ago, what would my life be like if I can work from home? I would say that no doubt, I would be working hard on my writing (aka this website) and also be working out more, since it will be easier for me to take a shower or not wear cloth…
In my imagination, my life quality would dramatically increase if I get to work from home. I will wake up early to take a walk using the time that I would have spent on doing make up and commute. I would have my laptop beside my work computer. So I can easily jump into writing when there is nothing to do at work. It would be much more tolerable to go on a diet since there is no easy access to food court. I could sip tea on my patio at noon and open a bottle of wine right at 4:00 pm. Oh, I would become such a happy and beautiful person that is totally in my zone, IF, I get to work from home.
Well. They did say that reality is a B*#$^.
I am now even more disappointed in my willpower. Because of the quarantine, I am one of the lucky ones that get to work from home. I did save all the commute time. BUT, I am fatter and more miserable than ever before. I didn’t even do any writing for…a month now? I feel empty, constantly. It is easy to use food to fill that void, even better, make the food spicier, sweeter, or more buttery! I NEED THE TASTE! Sadly, as always, force feeding myself does not really help. Oh yes I know what I SHOULD do: go out to get more sunshine; run; go to bed earlier; eating healthy; run; work on my side-hustle; run…It is quite disappointing when your body gave up on listening to your commands. No, I would rather lie on my bed for 10 minutes than going out for a lunch walk. I am watching my life flying by, colorless, tasteless, like a zombie. Am I even alive right now?
Am I the only one not handling well during this golden opportunity of working from home? Can I turn it around before it ends? Will I gradually turn into a ball from all the midnight snacks?