Hide

Have you had that feeling that you just want to go hide somewhere? Maybe just for a little bit, away from all the people and all the demands, responsibilities, expectations, deadlines…. I know it is not the right way to deal with life and realistically, this does not erase any issues but rather making things worse in most cases. BUT, I still want to hideaway sometimes.

I can feel my anxiety creeping up and the weight on my chest is getting heavier and heavier. Then I feel light-headed as I probably didn’t get enough oxygen to my brain. Normally right after that, I will start to judge myself for being so weak and not being competent enough to “just deal with it”. Then the unbearable guilt joins the party, hand-in-hand with sadness and hopelessness. BAM! Perfect storm for depression is now activated.

People told me to make a list in situation like this, a list of to-dos, then just tackle them one by one. However, I would soon realize that most of things on the list cannot be solved by myself or cannot be solved right away. So the list just keeps on getting longer as my breathe gets shallower.

HELP! Let me breath…

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